blaDing..cYclinG..iCe sKating?

before i start elaborating on the title..let me just complain about my stupid msn!urggh!!!it is still signing in nw!gross!

yah..about my nick..haha..i wanna learn these since im slacking and will be for two more weeks!haha..apart from giving tuition im trying to pack my days!haha

tmr is my sis birthday and great we are going to east coast park and im GOING TO LEARN BLADING!!!yes!finally i get to learn sth new!after that im going to learn cycling and ice skating!keep my fingers crossed that me cn master all of them!

sorrie linnie and vonnie dat me gtta change our meeting to fri instead of tml!i cant wait to meet u two babes!

watching miss universe nw and the contestants are jus simply gorgious!yah!babes..!

me jus read the email frm weejin our chief gl!
haha..he sounded so excited in his msg!haha..me hope i can tahan the camp after a three days sewniors' camp before that!wow!its going to be so shiong!

but all my camps will start on the 20th june so to those who wants to go out!please jio me before this date ok?hehe!!

im all geared to go to the pool all often den nt!yay!went todae!
going on thurs and fri again!den next mon thurs and fri?haha..

this week is going to be a calm week coz hes now in pattaya with mf and all..yah...
so no smses and he wnt b on msn too!haha..he will be back on sat but so what ill be packed till sunday..

got his smses on last sunday after our last east coast outing last tues..
yah..its another of those 'mei!!!im so bored!!!' msges..so u see what i mean?nvm if u don't:P

im trying very hard to get him out of my mind..really!maybe i jus cant?does it mean that we shldnt meet up..shldnt keep in contact so that i will succeed?does it mean i have really gotta do this?i dun wan to bear w this feeling for another year..realli!and its been a year for this gor-mei r'ship!i cant believe this!on the 19th july it will be the official date when we recog each other as bro and sis..of coz he will not remember and i aint surprised that hes ignorant bt this!c'mon lor..even he doesnt noe when is my birthday when its so close to his!haha

im relaxing and see how things go..

yesterday i went to the fd fest w my mum and i treated her to lerk thai..haha..wanted to treat her since a long time alr..

was surprised that my mum act. told me to grab any opportunities that come my way..guess u guys shld noe what shes referring too bah..was telling her that i dun gif a shit if im going to be attached or not..i dun care if i have a bf or even if he is gg aft her ***..i dun wanna care!its so so tiring..
mummy saes i shldnt haf this kinda silly thots of not getting a bf soon!

why not?thats what she used to say what?why is she changing her stand?i was used to hearing her say the benefits of being single..how wonderful and carefree one will be to be w/o a bf..advantages of not getting married..not hafing children..hw great and peaceful to be a 'bix-woman'......etc. etc.

now all has changed..shes no longer telling me these!she has been influencing me and asking me to be sharp eyed!how to pick a prospective bf, husband a son in law!
MUM!!!why this sudden change of tone?i cant understand!

suddenly i feel so lonely..even my mummy is trying to 'sell' me away!aiyo!
not only am i abandoned emotionally now even physically?what is going on!

im jus pondering too much?yah..i tink im gg nuts if i dun sort out my life before sch starts!

sometimes i jus wonder if time can freeze during my jc daes!the time when i didnt meet him..time when we werent g** and m**..time when i was younger..the time when i wasnt bothered..

sighh...

enuf!tmr is going to be an exciting day!

im gg to pierce eyehole w my sis!haha..finally gt a 'yes' frm me daddy!gave up persuading mummy go to daddy lor!haha..super exciting!

and yes its me myself again!a vainer gal at large! so sorrie pals! ive changed and im deteriorating for the worse...

joleen is no longer the past self the pk whom uve known..im sorrie:(