joleen, i hate you..

i cant seem to concentrate on my tut..

warning:frans! this is gg to be another shitty entry..if ya peeps r too sick of wads happening to me..tink ya r dun carry on reading k? i beg u...

a pleasant surprise?i thot it was..NO!i rather not haf that 'surprise'..its not a pleasant one..NO!not at all!the wrd 'substitute'?i truly understd this word..a word which i refused to face..a wrd that hurts lyk hell!a wrd dat is jus so painful..a wrd that cuts deep into me..yah!this is the wrd!

the card he held was for..the waiting was for..

heart sank in again!
not as deep as bfore but bad enuff to trigger the tears..
weak?yah i am..

n all the suanings i gt in hall r not helping..yah..i laughed it off..yah..but do u peeps noe somethings r nt funny at all?not at all i tell u!simply rubbish..but i cnt lose my cool..nt in front of u..of cox not..dunno hw much u r to me..but jus nt in front of u..i dun mind as lg as u r happy..im alritex yeah?

n my door is definitely shut for u..im so sorry..i apologise..im really sorry..impossible is jus the wrd..im really sorry..i noe saeing sorry will not help but im really sorry..

never hated joleen so much..used to be so proud of her..shes so full of confidence..now shes nt only a piece of shit i tink shes jus worse than dat..i look down on her..i hope she can jus disappear to somewhere no one noes..

mummy..y do i haf to go thru this?
mummy!