sleepyhead confirmed

as im typing this entry..im confirmed falling asleep!
apart frm falling aslp im lyk msn-in..and thus my entry is lyk half-hearted..sighh..

i feel lyk slping!haha.

busy in sch these 3 days for caroling choir camp..yawns..sing till wanna cry..tml mus go buy n make honey water for the choir if not dey cfm will lose their voice...haha...wah actually me wanna slp before 12 but nws alr 1203am..yawns..me shall quickly finish it and zzzz!

actually dun really noe wad to blog..nvm..mb too tired alr!

kkie..dis morn went to visit the new hall..and i was really really taken aback dat hall 13 is jus a rd away frm e new hall 3!YUCKS!!DISGUSTING!LYK SHIT!!WANNA PUKE!!

its pure jealously..yah..it is..i jus dun wanna see him..anywhere near me...near where im staying..but the thot that she is living so near me irks me!
mb she will be off hall next sem alr?

the best thing is that he wun be in spore...n its good dat he will be in holland!great!the further he is the better..

i cannot deny e fact dat no matter hw far..hw much..hw hard i try..it will be there always..yah..always..wanting to forgt?its nt easy!it really isnt...wad i cn do nw is to channel me energy(nt much left)to hall..but my fuel is running low..jus pack my days and if possible spend time at hm to slack...to slack..to slack..

sighh..

dun tok bt dat alr..

ytd's choir was rather a flop..for a while i wa the onli soprano singing n me sing till i wanna die..literally..wanna die..all melody..all so hiong!wah!puke blood..jianming had to sing the bass and jeremiah sang tenor till he lost his voice..hmm..todaes morns n aft's attention was satisfactory but nitex suddenly disappear..aiyo..tmrs the last day..n hope everything will be fine!sighh...

good good tml cn go hm n haf fun for the next to days bfore me cm bk on fri for mtg n duties on sat..den sun is little peng pengs bdae!!great!gtta go hm early to gif tuition n go to cousins palce to celebrate my nephew's 1st bdae!orhh...so cute!

gtta slp...tml gtta go but tumbler for honey water...yawns

an end to my rottin daes..

yah..tmr will be e start of the daes ahead..cox of hall stuff:P
yah im complaining..on the other hand..im lyk slacking..

n yah...no more job for me during the weekends..super sad..the job sds so interesting but gtta haf lotsa guts!as in its really a public performance in twn!imagine gtting paid n acting in the public!in orchard..wow!
but everything went dn the drain cox ive gtta handle my caroling sessions n clashes w jcrc..no choice..i see my opportunity to perform gg dn the drain..whoosh!DOWN THE DRAIN!

nvm i guess..wad more cn i do?as for money wise...depend on tuition..no choice..my passion?stick to my hall performance!and yah..in case u peeps do not noe im in my hall's production next year..so support support kaex?
toking bt passion?wads passion?im losing passion for a lot of things..im not as enthu as bfore..mb im gtting old..NO NO!!cant cant!

gtta quickly save up for my photoshoot next march..yah..its a gift frm me to me!for my 21st bdae..haha..so peeps!prepare!haha..joking onli:) tink i shall siam..see hw:p

was so bored dat i resorted to reading pples' friendster's testimonials..haha..read a few..n chanced upon his..shudnt haf read..wad e hell..but whu cares?

the thot of gg bk to hall irks me..but nvm get to mix ard w peeps in hall n enjoy life..gtta go for training..n instead of slacking n gtting pple tok behind my nack..i shall be a 'good' princess n train for netball n volleyball..n since onli gtta handle tuition..me will find activities and meet up wif frans!

phew..me pals' exams r ending n finally cn meet up!!yeah!
finally finally!

n im still struggling to understand myself..my life..

sometimes i wonder..mb time shuld freeze at the jc time..though tough yet memorable..though less freedom yet im freed..though less interesting yet im satisfied..though dull yet its fulfilling..

an end to my rotting daes..
a start to forgt..to mingle..to live..for miracles..to dream

a new look a new me?

jus gt my hair cut n nw its nt waist long but its shoulder length..suddenly i feel lighter..but i MISS MY LONG HAIR...my lg lg hair..

din actually expect dat it will be shoulder length..haha..jus went into the uaual salon n tk out a mag wif jappie weds den me jus lked at the pics n pted..the auntie saed..try lahs..quite nice..den she started trimming..cutting..thinning..n tada!a shoulder length cropped hair..my sis commented:so short..!haha..

ive lg hair for lyk 4 yrs so its time for change..so i jus let auntie cut lorhs..she saed if i were to highlight will be nicer..yah..im considering..wait till i gt my next tuition fees:) haha..

i tink i lyk fresher..but peeps dun laugh at me kaex?i tink its nt bad..n me mum- a supporter for shorter hair, liked it a lot..saed i lyk yger..haha..asking me y i din cut lyk dis earlier..haha..so funny..next i wan ear holes..haha..lyk mes asking alot..

i miss my long hair..fast isnt it?
but my hair will grow..bk to the usual length..jus a few mths..but nvm its a new look..a newer me..

zhiyu is gg to us for exchange.. hes gg holland for exchange..im wondering y im nt gg anywhere for exchange..im tinking of gg smu during sem 1 of yr 3..shall kiv this idea!

i was a bit shocked when he sad hes gg there for an exchange on the 22nd jan..i jus dunno hw to react over msn when he told me that..but i jus cool-ly asked when hes leaving..yah..dunno lahs..as usual..asking me to go find a bf..tink so easy to find meh?jus anwhw pick ah?c'mon..mus haf sm std..

dis is wad mel said:'a bf mus be one whom u will be proud to go out with n to be seen with'..haha..it makes sense in a way..a bf should b one whom u r comfy toking w, enjoy act. w, can be trusted, n will feel gd when u r w him..n of cox proud to intro to n be seen by frans:)
haha..alas!influenced by mel!melmel!u see lahs..

but its true i feel..but i realli dun lyk it when he asks me to go find one..hellos!u r despo to haf a gf but im nt eager to gt a bf!of cox i wun mind hafing one who cn care for me n do things tgt..its fated lahs..

tink god has been kind to me but the boys r so funnie..not sch/hall peeps but strangers..a scardy cat i mus sae will be damn afraid to go out w peeps whom i dunno!so even if dey mean no harm..im jus lyk letting em go..one by one..

hall peeps r nice..lyk my uncle..hes so encouraging n corny..so funnie..thanks UNCLE!haha..hes nt exactly dat old lahs..my freshie sm more...a yr older onli..but hes my uncle..u always make me laugh..n thanks for the praises!haha..trying to mk me happy onli..
den deres another fran zg..quite funnie oso..he bikes n offers to chauffeur me ard..but NOPES..i dun tk bikes..sorry..dangerous lahs..plus me mummy will KILL me if i were to ride on one!if nothing happens its okie..if really so unlucky dat i were to meet wif an accident..den im cfm A GONER!!thanks zg ..
these 2 boys r so cute..though dey r 1/2 yrs older dey act as if dey r my age..haha..dey will call me gongzhu/princess cox dey noe ill feel good!haha..so funnie..always play alg wif me..thanks dudes

den another hes jere for short..hes me n daphs khaki..act. tink hes closer to daph..den he said ytd during msn dat hes nt close to ani gals in hall other than us..i tk it as okie lorhs..a helpful pal whose always ard to help us..haha..a but pyschotic..lyks exotic animals lyk frogs..eekss..oh pls!haha..other den dat ok lahs..

dere r gal pals ard oso of cox..but none as close as vonnie,shanx tingx charms n linnie nt forgtting zhiyu n winnie!dey r my 'PRECIOUS' frans..yah..uni frans r mostly hi-bye..its true..i jus wanna sae thanks to huishan n melissa for making my uni life easier!great to haf known u all..plus peeps lyk kit edmind liying joey danny..n yah..him..yah..him..my freshies too!

dere r other peeps ard whu r nice..wads nice?for me..i regard everyone as nice!as in yah..if ya r okie w me im okie w u..i tink im friendly enuf n if ya r nt happy w me den me haf nothing more to sae..

its amazing dat i do haf a gal fran frm hall whom i cn consider my gd fran..again hw gd is gd?at least to encourage n being there for me:)heys!u nv tell me ya r in dnd's bix subcom!

so my life is currently revolving ard gals mostly..haha..so heys where to find bf?dun ask me to gt a bf can..i believe if it cmes it will cm..so no use finding..if it doesnt den doesnt lorhs..i dun mind staying single..do i mind?yah i dun mind!most of my gdy pals r still single wads..nvm ritex?let me be the pres of singles' club!haha..

shall highlight my hair next next week bfore xmas!den councilors u peeps cn see!haha..mus wait till i gt my pay first..its gonna cost 60..wah..so much!haha

a new look, a new joleen, a new princess n a new me?

a NEW skirt!

yippee!!
ive gt meself a new skirt from bugis street!heehee..

gave tuition dis aft den headed to parkway to collect my photos..realised dat me din developed all of the photos..urghh..,missed out the orientation camp's..aiyo..me had alr.filled my 2 200 photo albums!me go gt a new one..one exclusively taken during my uni daes..

aft parkway..went to bugis alone..not dat me enjoy shopping aln but deres practically no one who cn acc. me..all r hafing exams!haha..n me will never ask a guy out..haha..yah!dats me!no way!haha..wadever u tink but too bad..dis JOLEEN!

yah..walked ard n finally found wad im supposed to get for her..been thinking real hard bt wad to get n finally!haha..nahnah..mes nt gg to sae wad ive bought cox she may be reading dis entry..but i guarantee i like it n hope she will too!

very soon!will be meeting yanshan n all!shanxshanx!tell us wad ya wan for ya bdae!
u noe wad..i haven wore the visor as yet..cox i dunno when n where to wear it to..its nice but i realli dunno when i cn wear it..wasted lehs..so next year..haha..

toking bt my new skirt..it costs 30 bucks..a bit ex but i lyk it..unique design!heehee..realised me haf a few skirts which r a bit old n faded so planning to gt at least 3 more!haha..den a few too short..heehee..mus diet den cn fit!haiya..dunno y dun seem to be slimming dn any further..y?vexed!urghh!

my lala land...

yah..jus feel lyk sleeping again..haha..

had tuition n actually prepared to go out..all dressed up n even wore me contacts n stuff..den decided against the idea..jus simply lazy to go out on my own n e worst thing is that im dozing off alr..hw to enjoy my shopping spree lidat?haha..nt that me haf lotsa to spend but yah jus feel lyk gtting more skirts n a a pair of new shoes..n i wanna go pierce earhole..haha..afraid that they will act. gt infected..

me wanna gt a new image!but i dunno hw!!lyk dye my hair..i mean highlight..den im worried that they will be damaged..
aiya..mes afraid of this n that..eventually nothings done!eekss!dats y i hate myself!always tinking so much..so much..always choosing the safest path..nt a daredevil..if this e case i foresee myself nt hafing dyed hair nt wearing earrings n most importantly!!nt a new image!!

urghh..hw hw?im so bored..maybe its nt a good idea to end exams way earlier than frans..i wanna find work!

stupid classified!no suitable jobs...either dat or me cnt seem to wrk during the period for the jobs..urghh...

now learning a new song...by JJ n Jinsha..'BEI FENG CHUI GUO DE XIA TIAN'
quite nice...haha..

yawns..its sleeping time..n im barely awake for 5 hrs!haha

its been a long time..

its been long time since i cn slack this much n sleep up to 12 hrs..haha..so nice..

mes waiting for my frans to finish their exams so we cn go out n play!

tink im gg to get hell frm the jcrc peeps..cos mes act. looking for jobs which im nt suppose to..but the thing is i need sm cash to tide me off w the hostel fees..an increment of 400 is no joke..luckily hafing tuition and my hall fran roped me in for a job onli during the weekends till xmas..heehee..tink its gonna be fun cox we r all hall peeps so at least will be hafing tgt..but hafta see wad im gg to wear for the job..see hw lahs..

wanna go ktv n hope me cn haf a session next week..mes learning sgs nw..haha..
once their exams start mes gg bk to hall again...
a bit sians..maybe yr 3 will mv out le..depends bah...

heehee..cn wait to meet up wif yanshanx tingx n charms..ct councillors!our chalet!wows!heehee..so fun so fun n our xmas dinner!haha..den other buddies like zhiyu charmaine..oh ya suppose to org a sec 2 outing?haha...forgt bt it..peeps like cheowlu n lynn..

lking at my list..haha..no wonder me mum is gtting worried bt my social life..y all gals?haha..shes worried y n i tink its quite ridiculous of her to do so..all alg in gals sch except in jc n im nt considered close to any guys so yah lahs..of cox my companions r girls lahs..for a while she was worried dat i go out w guys den nw shes even more worried dat im gg ouyt wif gals..so funni!haha..tink she asked more bt whu r the gals than when i sae im gg out w guy..haha..

mummy..dun worry lahs..me noe wad me cn/cant do..n im nt dere yet..relax..
haha...no worries!

to pals still hafing exams!continue to mug hard n all will be over sn!
to those whu r free lyk me cn try to jio me out..haha..cox frans r hafing exams so..sians...haha...

slacking? no lorhs

gg to enter a short one since my break is ending sn!

at hm nw my exams will start next tues..haha..did a paper this morn..std okie but mus do faster..luckily its open book..else madi!

yawns mus go mug again..cnt wait for all papers to be over!haha..den all e plans will cm into play!
cnt wait to meet shanx on the 16th..

n councillors!if ya r reading this...its lyk shit lorhs our chalet frm 19th to 21st but ive gt caroling on all these 3 days!wad the hell!no choice..ill rush dn yeah!sure will go!haha

cnt wait for ktv w mei mei!haha..

kie gtta go n mug!kampete!

so bored..

so bored by the amt of readings ive to digest!
read thru sets of them this morn..wow..aft reading was suppose to summarise n map em out but was so strained mentally dat i jus read n read..today mus finish these 2 modules so me cn start w the papers tme..shall do the mapping chap n by chap..given the time cinstrain tink i cn jus do a guide for the linkages n the references for use in the exams..luckily 3 out of 4 r open bk exams!but still needa understd wad..!

jus gt so sick dat ive to mug thru more readings for info systems so decided to cm online..but it seems dat everyonr is busy mugging so nt toking to anione one msn..msn has becm a must since hall days..haha..

jus checked my ntu mail n saw a mail frm my prof for taxation..haha..lifted my spirit a little!y?cox the title read:76 for AA305 quiz 3 keep up the good work!
haha..okay lorhs..i did wrk quite a bit so..yah..mus kampate!

so sian so sian...guess wad playing pinball on my lappie..

sighh..thot cn enjoy ct chalet but may haf caroling at jp on the 20th n 21st..shit lahx..but gd in the sense that at least we din haf too few places to carol this yr else will relect damn badly on us as cultural secretaries..urghh but i dun wanna forgo my break n gathering w my ct pals!tink gtta travel to n fro..see hw ,,yt to cfm..

problems problems problems..

act.dey sae when we blog we mus be prepared dat watever we blogged will be divulged..will be widely read..its nt a palce for private entry..yah..i agree..my blog is accessible to my frans n their frans whom i may or may nt noe..act. dun really lyk the idea of having links dats y my blog doesnt provide links to aniones..on the other hand me dunno hw to link..haha..comp idiot can?haha..

though i noe my 'secrets' will be read..i din really try to hide any specific stuff..being a straight fwd gal..n one w big ego..haha..those who noe me since dunno when will realise dis..haha..my feelings are evident..dere r things which wld luf to blog but i jus cnt cox yah..so ive another 'hard copy'..yah..wad deters me frm blogging some 'sensitive' issues is the fact that huishan act. told me dat me seniors act. went to serch for my blog cox someone cm across it n read sth bt him..yah..so im so super wary..

toking bt him..yah HIM..'deres nothing called bro n sis r'ship'..charmaine told me this..
maybe its true..i dun care alr..keep jumping in n out of this shithole is jus so exhausting..so nt gg to care animore..a part of me is inclined to him..y treat him so nice? on wad basis?no basis other den b n s rship which supposedly doesnt exist..

side note: tink i treat my frans fairly well so y dis discrapancy?i mean nt nw but den..wadever..if ya tink mes nt treating ya well tink u mus be super irritating..my threshold for irritatance is relatively high!haha..

dunno hw to repond to the current situation..usually guys r nt so persistant but..
shld i gif him a chance..he msged me again..i dunno..din reply cos ive really gt no time n if i do will i meet up w him?i mean dun even noe him,..hes a stranger whom i met on THAT train on THAT day..its jus so ridiculous..

maybe its cox of him..i shant continue else im jus propelling meself bk to the past..the memories which i wished i did not have..truthfully ive nv been dat comfortable w sm one bfor esp twds a guy..i mean cn tok n go out one on one..usually go out in grps lyk ctc..ill feel weird w a guy aln..no topic wads..mb hes *** dats y..n mb dats the reason for my inclination..no lahs shall stop all dese nonsense!

sometimes feel lonely haha..act. not really...mb its jus cox of the current situation of 'danger' dats y mb i tink i nid smone to provide me w the security..haha..a bodyguard in other wrds..

kudos to charmaine dat dae for sending me hm..n bothered to 'pick' me up frm hm to studi at macs..thanks thanks!
charmaine,if ya r reading dis i mus tell ya dat its really weird cos yah..i tink u noe wad i wanna sae..its a guy thing n ya r jus lyk my other gal frans frm my py of view..but u r jus special..since ive said so much i tink im nt afraid to sae dat i used to tok behind my seniors bk when i noe dey r lyk u..hope u r nt hurt by this sentence..i seriously apologise to u if i did..i mean its my true feeling..i duuno wad others may sae when we do go out tgt smtimes..gtta admit dat i wasnt comfy at first but nw who cares man!u r my fran n wad dey tink dont matter..i wanna sae a BIG BIG THANK YOU for ya constant support and advices..THANK YOU!glad to noe ya..lyk wad ive told ya..u r so interesting..haha..

tink tis is a super long entry which ill end here..gtta go bk to mug..problems will always be dere..its hw we cope hw we forgt hw we choose to handle hw we ignore..

as for me?ive yet to find out..nw its jus exams!
i WAN MY As!but will be more than satisfied if i cn gt all Bs..